Perseverance

I am not a patient person. If I didn't know this before I know it now. Waiting is hard. Today has seemed harder for some reason. It has been 1 month waiting but it feels like a lifetime. This entire journey began 2 years ago so really the waiting has been longer. My faith is being tested to the max. Every day that goes by without a potential match for a child and month after month of negative pregnancy tests really takes a toll on a person. I think I am sad today because of words that were exchanged that were meant to be playful but felt like a dagger to my heart. One thing I have learned throughout all of this is the true meaning of "holding your tongue". My parents can vouch for me that I am not typically very good at this. I speak what I feel. However, I now take to heart the verse from Proverbs 21: 23 "Watch your words and hold your tongue; you'll save yourself a lot of grief." What you may think is not hurtful or just silly can actually be very malicious, especially to someone with a hurting heart. This can hold true for any situation. I won't preach more about this issue but just think about it. Remember this this next time you open your mouth: "Whoever restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding. Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent." Proverbs 17: 27-28


I am beginning to get the feeling that this (infertility) trial in my life has something to do with learning patience. I have been bombarded by the following scripture verse the last 2 weeks: “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” James 1:2-4 (NIV)  First, I read it in my book "Hannah's Hope". Then, it was a reading at church last Sunday and yesterday it was the topic of my daily devotional. Coincidence? I think not! Obviously, God is trying to tell me something! My trusty girlfriend in God, Mary Southerland, couldn't have said it better,

I tend to consider it pure joy when I can escape trials of many kinds, but James tells us that trials can and should be faced with patience and an attitude of joy. Not joy for the trials but joy in the trials. Don’t miss this vital truth. Joy is deeply-rooted confidence that God is in control. Joy is a chosen attitude and understands that trials are not punishment.

Take a $5 bar of steel. If you cut that bar into ordinary horseshoes, it is worth about $10. That same $5 bar of steel cut into needles is worth $350 but cut into delicate springs for watches, that same $5 bar of steel is worth $250,000.

Trials are a test, a measurement of growth. Patience gives God permission to work and even expects to be tested.We go to great lengths to avoid trials and shelter ourselves from the storms of life. The result is spiritual immaturity. God will not build our character without our cooperation and He will not work in us without our permission. We must surrender, invite Him to work and then by faith, patiently embrace that work in our life. Warren Wiersbe writes, “When God permits his children to go through the furnace, He keeps his eye on the clock and his hand on the thermostat.” Doubt puts our circumstance between us and God while faith puts God between us and our circumstances. Patience comes when we give up the responsibility for the outcome to God.

On the home front side of things we have picked out crib bedding and a theme for the nursery, yay! Sorry, no pictures will be shown until the final reveal! I will say, however, that I am extremely excited about our decision and the fact that I will get the chance to use some of my artistic abilities! We have also been continuing to keep busy by spending a lot of time with family, gardening, and planning more activities for the rest of the summer. We are VERY excited to have Aaron's sister, Ali, and our nephew, Jack, here for the weekend at our house. They live out of state so this is a welcomed visit. I know Aaron is really looking forward to their stay. I am sure we will have plenty of pictures to share. In the meantime, here is a little of what we have been up to recently:

 Luke swimming at the Heritage Inn @ Sauder Village

 Relaxing in the hotel room

 Some of the pretty landscape @ Sauder Village

 Josh being Josh!

 At the Naturalization Ceremony; 44 people become new U.S. citizens!

 Aaron driving the train

 Sam in the conductor's seat

 It was HOT!

 I think Josh sums up how we felt about the heat!

 Not sure what to say about this one

 Tomato plants

Cucumbers

 Bella enjoying our homegrown catnip

Orzo helping himself to the catnip when he thought I wasn't looking